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This is such a visible aspect of masculinity and is so very obvious that any males who doubt their masculinity struggle with the question of whether their erection is large enough to attract and satisfy women. If he fails to get and maintain an erection he feels less like a real man.

If the male ejaculates before he enters the woman he feels less like a real man and if he ejaculates too soon after entering the woman and thus, deprives the woman of her orgasm, he feels like a failure.

It goes without saying that masturbation occurs in isolation, at least under these circumstances, and the wife or partner is not involved in this solo activity. Why do so many men view porn in private and keep it secret from their wives, even from those wives who are willing partners in jointly viewing pornography as a "turn on" preceding foreplay and intercourse? One of the reasons why men who are married, engaged to be married, or have a girl friend with whom they are sexually active, engage in the viewing of pornography in secret has to do with an emotion we recently visited called shame.

The experience of shame is humiliating and includes feeling a sense of disgust and mortification about the self.

Both men and women experience feelings of shame around sexual issues but for different reasons.

Would it not be better to try and understand what is happening here between males and females and, through that understanding, develop better ways to cope with this problem?

Part of the reason why women are so angry about internet pornography is that it takes their men away from the family and from themselves.

In addition to body image issues, women struggle with what is and is not acceptable about being sexual when you are female.

To this day there remains the double standard that for men it is permissible to be sexual but for women sexuality represents being immoral and sinful.

Yet, once married, women are expected to be sexual and erotic for their husbands.

These conflicted feelings are often less intense today, in the wake of the women's liberation movement, but they still persist.

All of these are tests of masculinity for these adolescent men.

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